1 word story...

.. bob had second round offers tomorrow

And he actually got in.

So he didn't have time to nuke the concert

i_need_mental_asylum until he realized he misread the email. It wasnt his results, it was his rent

So Bob cried an ocean of tears

And re-read the email, which said "An offer is pending: Please log into the online portal and pay your dues."

He realized that the money he used towards the concert ticket cost $200 of his savings for rent.

So he went back to the concert, demanding a refund.

But the concert refused, telling Bob that the money was used for the furry cult.

he quickly travelled to the ohio to borrow their nukes, but then was chased by the FBI all the way back to melbourne.

The police demanded to see his ID

So he handed him a grenade

But then quickly realised that in his hands was not a grenade but a piece of cake

the police man was shocked

Moonlight_31 FOR THE CAKE WAS A LIE AND IT WAS ACTUALLY A GRENADE

which he realised after he took a bite

After the police exploded to smithereens, Bob quickly made a run for it hiding in his underground bunked just in case this happened.