mhsbandar My eyes were a rhythm of up and down fluctuations, searching for the emaciated dog. Suddenly, I felt a forceful push against my spine. I fell face-flat on the rutted floor. My nose ached from intolerable pain caused by the sudden impact. I gasped as I found myself a victim of the unsettling lightning. What shocked me wasn't that I was right under a lightning bolt, but the thing that pushed me to it. I realised than that I didn't leave my dog behind, but that the dog left me behind...

    MHS successful candidate no its actually pretty good, u have an extensive vocab which is really helpful, and the suspense u build will be helpful in the exam. but the thing is some of the vocab u use does not make sense in the context, like the sentence "My eyes were a rhythm of up and down fluctuations" could be proofread and changed to "My eyes scanned my surroundings franctically" or something similar. U should practise writing narratives in 20 minutes on paper, just search for a prompt, start a timer and then write, and when you're done or the time is up review it, proofread it, see where u made mistakes and take note of them for next time

        9 days later
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